The Ask and You Shall Receive Issue
In This Issue
-1- Editorial
-2- No Questions Asked
-3- The Price is Right
-4- From Russia With Love
-1-
Hey, sweets and sours. What’s new in your world? Sorry, no video today. I’m working on Episode 3 of Harajuku Boys and hope to have it done tomorrow or the day after. Amazing how long it takes to compile 6-7 minutes of video. In the meantime I thought I’d post up some food for thought. It’s not good to let thought go hungry. Malnourished thought is the number one cause of thoughtlessness today.
Ok, whatever – all this stuff is just from random conversations I’ve had, believe it or not, over the years. Yes, I retain useless information for that long a period. I reconstructed these IM convesations verbatim from memory. Kidding… I’m weird today.
Be easy.
-2-
stilljaems (4:25:49 PM): if you could change one decision you’ve made in your life
stilljaems (4:26:05 PM): just one
stilljaems (4:26:13 PM): what would you have for dinner?
sweet lonalina (4:26:32 PM): lobster
—
stilljaems (4:26:52 PM): if you could be anyone
stilljaems (4:26:56 PM): anyone in the whole wide world
stilljaems (4:27:07 PM): a real or fictional person
stilljaems (4:27:33 PM): would you get a motorcycle?
sweet lonalina (4:27:36 PM): yes
—
stilljaems (4:29:03 PM): if you could erase one person from your life
stilljaems (4:29:12 PM): totally delete them – every encounter, interaction
stilljaems (4:29:27 PM): and the impact and ramifications of that relationship
stilljaems (4:29:40 PM): what’s your favorite color
sweet lonalina (4:29:48 PM): blue
stilljaems (4:29:55 PM): me too!
stilljaems (4:31:07 PM): i like you
stilljaems (4:31:10 PM): you’re an intellectual
—
stilljaems (10:57:52 AM): if you could say something to someone close to you
stilljaems (10:58:03 AM): something you’ve always wanted to tell them but never had the courage to
stilljaems (10:58:23 AM): and you could tell them without any fear of repercussions or damage to your relationship
stilljaems (10:58:33 AM): what’s your favorite pizza topping?
maileleilei (10:58:57 AM): wait wait, too many questions
maileleilei (10:59:46 AM): i dont think u finished ur question
maileleilei (10:59:53 AM): pepperoni
—
stilljaems (11:08:33 AM): if your partner falsely accused you of cheating on them
stilljaems (11:08:39 AM): and you knew that you didn’t
stilljaems (11:09:19 AM): but that your partner would not believe the truth and you would have to tell a lie in order to comfort and assure them
stilljaems (11:09:46 AM): who would be your favorite backstreet boy?
maileleilei (11:10:09 AM): haha
stilljaems (11:13:28 AM): come on
stilljaems (11:13:31 AM): don’t dodge the question
maileleilei (11:14:00 AM): i dont know them
maileleilei (11:14:04 AM): hehe
stilljaems (11:17:02 AM): bah
stilljaems (11:17:23 AM): you and your secrecy… you never open up to people
stilljaems (11:18:23 AM): how are you ever going to grow as a person if you don’t tell people who your favorite backstreet boy is
stilljaems (11:18:37 AM): we won’t judge you if it’s howie
—
jaems: if you were on a plane taking a trip somewhere
and the plane was going to crash into the ocean
and only survivors would be you and the person traveling with you
and you would have to spend the rest of your lives together on a deserted island
what would your favorite flavor of ice cream be?
chryselle.delacruz: hahahaah…crap…im blushing right now….(people beside me are lookin at me with dismay…what is wrong with her?!??!i almost choked from laughin)
well if u had to ask…..i would say..jamocha almond fudge…labbbsss it
jaems: interesting… that says a lot about you as a person
chryselle.delacruz: really???how so?
jaems: it means you like black asian guys… who are kinda nutty…
-3-
For $250,000 would you live underwater for 3 months? You get a scuba suit, oxygen and some means of staying nourished.
For $1,750 would you wear diapers for a week, and that would be your only means of going potty? Yes, you may change after use.
For $1,500 would you tape chicken patties under your armpits and keep them there for 3 days? You must play basketball 1 out of the 3 days.
For $850 would you karate chop a bum in his buttcrack and then slide your hand down and out while singing the Karate Kid theme song? The bum gets $50 but not out of your pocket.
For $10,000 would you headbutt 100 baby monkeys to death? Wherever this would happen, there is an overpopulation of monkeys and they will be shot by government officials anyway. You may either headbutt or tickle them to death.
For $6,500 would you give your dad a piggback ride everywhere you went for a week? This includes the shower and using the toilet.
For $2,000 would you pour 10 gallons of honey all over your naked body and run around a bear infested forest for 2 hours?
For $1,250 would you eat a booger sandwich? The boogers are yours and it’s served on white bread with mayo only.
For $3,750 after a bastketball game would you take Shaquille O’Neal’s socks and wring them into your mouth?
For $75,000 would you eat nothing but hard-boiled eggs and vitamins/supplements (to fulfill nutritional requirements) for a year?
For $4,000 would you be put in a coffin and buried for 2 hours? You have air and a panic button.
For $8,000 would you dress up like a cowboy, sneak up on a gorilla, jump on his back and rodeo ride him as long as you could?
For $7,000 would you tattoo a swastika on your forehead, and dress up like Hitler for a week? And you have to go about your daily business and can’t tell anybody that you’re getting paid.
I have a bunch more that my friends and I came up with long before Fear Factor and all that jazz. Unfortunately, they are probably inappropriate for this forum. If I included chopping a bum’s buttcrack and headbutting baby monkeys, you can only imagine what I didn’t include.
-4-
I know a lot of you have been asking, “Jaems, are you talking to anyone?”, “When are you going to get a girl?”, “What’s up with you always talking about your kids in Mexico”, “Why do you always wear cowboy hats and chaps, even to play basketball?”. Well, guess what? I’m getting a girlfriend, with the potential for marriage! It’s awesome, my coworker hooked us up and she’s coming here soon! I’m so excited and you’re all invited to my wedding at the Econo Lodge next to Newark Airport, here in lovely Jersey. We’re registered at eBay.
From: Ken (SC US)
Sent: Tuesday, November 07, 2006 11:54 AM
To: James (SC US)
Cc: Paula (SC US)
Subject: FW: hi from Russia
James,
Unfortunately, like Patrick in the email below, I am married and have two kids as well. But perhaps you would be interested in meeting Maria. As you will see by her note, she plans to travel to the U.S. in the next three days and would like to meet and “have some weeks or months” together. I am no matchmaker, but it sounds it sounds to me like you kids would really hit it off. Keep me posted.
—–Original Message—–
From: Maria [mailto:mvskae@cetus-moerdijk.com]
Sent: Tuesday, November 07, 2006 11:35 AM
To: Ken (SC US)
Subject: hi from Russia
Hi!!!
How are you? My name is Maria. I am 26 years old. I live in Russia, city Cheboksary. I am cheerful woman, and like to do many things as sport, camping, go to the cinema, theatre etc. In a word I like to do all what like all people. I work in marketing structure on sale of cosmetics. My dream this travel abroad. I know the english language well enough.. I began to study english language approximately one year ago. I wish tell to you history which have pushed me write to you. 8 months ago I have got acquainted with the man from other country by name Patrick. During this time we had good relations. We have understood that our relations become serious and we have decided to meet in his country. I wrote the application for reception the visa. I waited reception of the visa approximately half of year. All time I kept in touch with Patrick through the internet and often called to each other. I and Patrick waited reception of the visa to our meeting.
I have received the invitation from the ambassador for reception of the visa. My director has given me long-term holiday from work and I have gone to Moscow to receive the visa. I informed good news to Patrick, but he has answered, that does not want our meeting. He played with me. He has informed that has the wife with two children and at all has no plans to meet me. I was not ready to such turn of events. I could not think what even after 8 months of acquaintance he can so unscrupulously act with me. Now I am in Moscow trip to Moscow and reception of visa. I do not want that all was gone for nothing and will be glad if my visa will be useful to our meeting. I could arrive already through 4-5 days, but a problem in that that now I have no man which would like my arrival. Probable it will silly sound but if you will be interested in a meeting with the good woman I shall like to meet you sometime soon! As Patrick was dishonest with me I have decided to find the man which is interested to meet the woman from Russia. I do not know your ideas about my letter, but it would be fine if we could meet and have some weeks or months together. On my trip I want to receive rest from my work and a life in Russia. Also the basic purpose for the future it is search good men for serious attitudes which go to a marriage. I have no children, but I want to have children in the future. I am the mature woman and ready to creation of family with good man. I do not know what you really search in the future but if we could meet I shall be happy to discuss with you more about our meeting. What are you going to do this time? It would be fine if we could meet, do friendship or more than simply friendship. I shall be happy if you also have a free time and we could meet soon. I do not know your interests, but anyhow write to me back and I shall tell to you more about myself. Write to me all that you want. Maybe we have similar plans and it will be interesting to us together.
You can write all that you want. Ask any questions which interest you.
Write to me back and I shall tell more about myself and send more my photos.
Please, write to me back on my regular e-mail: marlan111@bk.ru Have a good day,
Maria.
jae1775 